Norman Douglas:
"The fact is, these objects in their present situation are exposed to so many risks that we may well envy the whales, and in a booklet entitled 'Hints for God' I make bold to suggest that, at the next creation of the world, they be located in a position of greater security. If He agrees to my proposal He will earn the gratitude of all save a few little boys whose testicles remain hidden upstairs, and are anyhow too small to be taken seriously.
"Whoever wishes to see what this organ can do in the way of size should go to Pernambuco, where it is nothing out of the way to see a man wheeling his testicles in front of him on a barrow. I suspect the disease (elephantiasis) was imported by Africans."
Or Take Your Pick:
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